The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret. Read Summary
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. Read Summary
While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake. Read Summary
I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays. Read Summary
You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. Read Summary
If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving. Read Summary
Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means. Read Summary
The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip. Read Summary
This man used to go to school with his dog. Then they were separated. His dog graduated! Read Summary
What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money. Read Summary
My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself. Read Summary
She's a big-hearted girl with hips to match. Read Summary
If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope. Read Summary
I played a lot of tough clubs in my time. Once a guy in one of those clubs wanted to bet me $10 that I was dead. I was afraid to bet. Read Summary
Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it. Read Summary
You have a nice personality, but not for a human being. Read Summary
My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash. Read Summary
That was the first time I saw a horse start from a kneeling position! Read Summary
Why don't Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering. Read Summary
When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays. Read Summary