Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories. Read Summary
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot. Read Summary
It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it. Read Summary
Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died. Read Summary
I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. Read Summary
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.' Read Summary
I poured spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. Read Summary
I live on a one-way street that's also a dead end. I'm not sure how I got there. Read Summary
When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. Read Summary
I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. Read Summary
When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good?' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.' Read Summary
Sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be if that didn't happen. Read Summary
Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect. Read Summary
My roommate got a pet elephant. Then it got lost. It's in the apartment somewhere. Read Summary
I was walking down the street wearing glasses when the prescription ran out. Read Summary
If one synchronised swimmer drowns, do all the rest have to drown too? Read Summary
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? Read Summary
When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. Read Summary
If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back? Read Summary
My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out. Read Summary